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Now THIS Is How You Sell an E36 M3

Jalopnik logo Jalopnik 2019-01-18 Patrick George
a truck driving down a street© Photo: Craigslist

From our own Aaron Brown, who has a daily Craigslist search alert set up for “Cheap M3s under $4,000,” comes the most brilliantly brazen for-sale ad I think I’ve ever seen. Forget the clever essay-length backstory and insane hyperbole. This is how you sell a car.

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The ad out of Hartford Craigslist is simple: It’s titled “Bmw m3 - $2000" and the description is just “97 crashed m34dr5sd” (self expalanatory, really) and a parts list, “Uuc clutch kit single mass fly 210mm rear dif from e32v12.” That’s it. Well, that and two pics of it crashed in a ditch.

Somebody wants this thing gone so badly, gives so few f**** about it, that they just listed it with crash pics and all. No obfuscating, no writing at length about how it has “mild frame damage” and “a few dings here and there, not bad for its age.” Nah, my dude! It’s like “Here’s my damned crashed car. You gonna buy it or what?”

a motorcycle that is sitting in the middle of a forest

In one of the pics, the M3 is laying on its side. Just incredible. You seldom encounter such refreshing honesty anywhere, anymore. The last car I bought on Craigslist had a ton of defective s*** that was supposed to be “new” and “recently fixed.” This? With this, you know what you’re getting.

While it’s sad that the E36 M3 continues to be the trash boy of the BMW world—all cheap tuner specials, would-be drift missiles and badly half-finished—it is a good car, even an underrated one. Give this one a shot, perhaps. Would that everyone on the internet could be this transparent.

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