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What I Really Want for Mother's Day

Mom.me logo Mom.me 2017-04-24 Meredith Gordon
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Photograph by Getty Images

In most families, mom is the planner. If her family were the "Love Boat," mom would be Julie McCoy, the cruise director who keeps everyone on track. But Mother's Day is the one of the few days when mom is supposed to surrender her cruise director responsibilities and let someone else, usually dad, steer the ship.

The problem is, some crazy person started a rumor that mom should spend Mother's Day entirely with her kids. When you have little kids, as I do, this doesn't feel like much of a celebration. I love my kids, just not as much as I love spending my Mother's Day reading the paper or getting a facial.

Every year, my husband politely asks me what I want to do for Mother's Day. Immediately, I'm kind of annoyed that his psychic powers haven't figured it out. That said, were he to plan the whole day without consulting me, I'm sure I'd be annoyed that he didn't ask me what I'd like.

But still, I like Mother's Day and want to a have a good one.

What I want to do on Mother's Day is probably a shorter list than what I don't want to do.

1. I want to sleep in. Sleeping in should in no way be interpreted as me lying awake while my children poke me in the eye, crying, "Are you done relaxing yet?"

2. I want to go to the gym without being rushed. I might grab a coffee or meander a bit too long.

3. I'll want to spend SOME time with the kids, right up until one of them poops her pants or throws a world-class tantrum. That's my cue to leave. After all, I'd hate to miss my massage and facial, and it's always best to use the steam room first.

4. A family dinner would be nice—at a restaurant I like. This will provide a perfect opportunity for my husband to experience the joys of watching other people eat when the little one goes nuts and won't stay seated 10 minutes after we've sat down.

But, Mother's Day is really marked by what I don't want to do.

1. I don't want to cook—for myself or for anyone else.

2. I don't I want to figure out how anyone else gets fed.

3. I don't want to wash dishes...

4. ...wash clothing, or...

5. ...wash tushes—unless it's my own.

6. I don't want to plan, nor do I want to have much of a schedule.

7. I don't want to wake up until I feel rested, and finally...

8. I don't want to worry about anyone but myself.

But I will of course. I'm a mom. Even on Mother's Day, I'll still want everyone to be happy. Just today, I'll try to make sure I am, too.

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