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Put away your pitchforks, and stop ruining everything: Thaiday’s joke was great

The Roar The Roar 2/06/2016 Riordan Lee

You had to have really been trying your best to have been offended by Sam Thaiday’s joke after State of Origin 1. But plenty did.

I should probably preface this by saying I think political correctness is a good thing, because it’s simply about not being a jerk, and considering how your words can hurt other people.

Which raises the question, who was Thaiday hurting last night? Who the hell are we protecting?

If you haven’t seen it, Sam Thaiday made this joke after Queensland ground out a sloppy, fumbling win against New South Wales:

“It was a bit like losing your virginity – it wasn’t very nice but we got the job done.”

I thought it was funny, others did not – that tends to happen with jokes.

But the screeching, outraged think-pieces that spread like wildfire this morning were insufferable, nauseating and patently wrong.

Let’s start with Anthony Sharwood’s spicy hot take in the Huffington Post: 'Sam Thaiday’s Origin line about virginity was the most tasteless sport thing ever', the headline reads – sadly, unironically. 

The most tasteless sports thing ever?

He says this, despite seemingly being aware of Chirs Gayle’s continued and unfortunate existence as an interview subject, the ritualistic vilification of Adam Goodes, and the fact that Bernard Tomic is still a thing.

But click-bait headlines aside, comb through Sharwood’s article and you’ll find he doesn’t even attempt to offer up a reason as to why anything Thaiday said was out-of-line.

That’s because there was absolutely nothing wrong with it.

The only point the joke was making was that the first time you have sex, it’s generally pretty average – but at least you did it.

And maybe I don’t speak for everyone, but in my experience, that is an entirely accurate observation.

Bras are way harder than you think to get off, and the transition from years of exclusively using your wrist, to mobilising the whole bottom half of your body is tragically clumsy, and surprisingly tiring.

Who could possibly take offence to this?

The only group I can think of is: people who have recently lost their virginity and don’t want to be pigeon-holed as sub-par lovers.

But maybe it’s not about offence, maybe it’s about appropriateness.

Maybe referring to the fact that people have sex is just too much for our precious ears, and worse, what if the children find out that they weren’t actually delivered by a crane!?

Surely in 2016, we’ve evolved beyond the Victorian-era notions of sexuality where we pretend penises and vaginas don’t exist.

Surely we’re not so repressed that at 10:30pm on a Wednesday night after watching 36 men bash the living hell out of each other for 80 minutes we can hear the tamest of sex references and not collectively explode in rage.

I guess not.

At Sydney Airport, a Channel 7 reporter tried to get Thaiday to apologise.

A Channel Seven reporter pressed him to reveal contrition at Sydney airport.

“Do you regret your comments from last night?”


“You don’t think they’re inappropriate at all?”


“You’re a professional athlete and you’re referring to winning a game like losing your virginity.”


“You don’t think that’s inappropriate?”

“No, not at all.”

He didn’t.

And nor should he.

“But aren’t you a family man?” she pressed him.

Yeah, and how do you think he became one of those?

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