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‘Not giving him all my savings’: Chinese woman storms out of home after mother demands she buy brother flat for future marriage

South China Morning Post logo South China Morning Post 6/12/2022 Liya Su
  • A young woman's heated argument with her mother about helping her older brother buy property renews debate on cultural norms
  • The woman shared her views on her experience in an online video that has trended on mainland Chinese internet

A woman in China who walked out of the family home after her mother tried to force her to hand over her savings so her elder brother could buy property has renewed discussion on cultural norms in the country.

The unnamed woman, from Liaoning province in northeastern China, went viral after sharing her experience in an online video. She was outraged when her mother tried to coerce her into giving all her money to her older brother so he could buy a flat, Sina News reported.

In the video, the woman is seen having an intense argument with her mother at her parents' home. She couldn't agree with her mother, who demanded she hand over her savings to her brother. She argued it was unfair, but her mother said her money belonged to the family.

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The woman's mother insisted her daughter help her son financially, arguing that her daughter's future husband would provide for her. Photo: Weibo © Provided by South China Morning Post The woman's mother insisted her daughter help her son financially, arguing that her daughter's future husband would provide for her. Photo: Weibo

"I can contribute something, but I'm not giving him all my savings. Later on, I will have to buy a home for myself," she said.

"You must hold on. Before that, you have to help buy a flat for your brother," the mother replied.

The woman said her brother had told her that he didn't need financial support from her, so she was confused and continued to ask her mother for further explanation. However, she became angrier with her mother after being told her brother is older than her.

In addition, the mother firmly clings to the traditional view that a woman would eventually get married and their future husband must pay a bride price and the cost of housing.

"The view of my mother is that if you are a woman, you will get married someday. So it's not necessary to buy property now," the woman said.

Millions of people have viewed the woman's video and voiced their opinions online after her story went viral on mainland social media. Photo: Weibo © Provided by South China Morning Post Millions of people have viewed the woman's video and voiced their opinions online after her story went viral on mainland social media. Photo: Weibo

"The money is mine. In any case, I can't agree with it," she added.

The woman decided to leave and packed her belongings and walked out of the family home. She then moved to a flat she rented.

"Women should have a place of their own; otherwise, in situations like this, I don't know where I can go," she said.

The woman's video has generated significant online discussion, with many criticising her mother's behaviour. At the time of writing, it had attracted nearly 7.5 million views and 7,168 comments on the Sina News report.

One person said: "Her mother is definitely a vampire."

Another questioned: "When can we change the traditional preference for males?"

Property in China has become increasingly expensive amid a series of property booms in recent decades. Photo: Shutterstock © Provided by South China Morning Post Property in China has become increasingly expensive amid a series of property booms in recent decades. Photo: Shutterstock

In Chinese society, daughters are often forced to boost their brothers' marriage eligibility by contributing financially.

Last week, it was revealed that a 33-year-old woman in eastern China's Anhui province had spent the past 12 years working and saving money so that her brother could cover the increasing cost of getting married.

Earlier in September, a 29-year-old woman in southern China was sued by her estranged parents after she refused to buy her younger brother an apartment.

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This article originally appeared on the South China Morning Post (www.scmp.com), the leading news media reporting on China and Asia.

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