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'Call it the rebel in me': 'Happily married' corporate high-flyer, 39, shamelessly admits he'll keep cheating on the mother of his kids because 'breaking the shackles' excites him

Daily Mail logo Daily Mail 6/11/2018 Laura House

a man and a woman posing for a picture: Ryan*, who is 'happily married' and has young children, said that while he has a 'great family', there are psychological and physical 'gaps' in his life that he simply cannot ignore (stock image) © Provided by Associated Newspapers Limited Ryan*, who is 'happily married' and has young children, said that while he has a 'great family', there are psychological and physical 'gaps' in his life that he simply cannot ignore (stock image) While most people keep the reasons for their affairs a secret, a 39-year-old businessman has revealed why he chooses to regularly, and unashamedly, cheat on his wife.  

Ryan*, who is 'happily married' and has young children, said that while he has a 'great family', there are psychological and physical 'gaps' in his life that he simply cannot ignore.

'There is also the aspect of business travel and spending endless evenings and nights by yourself... you want someone to share those times with you,' he told FEMAIL. 

Ryan said after being married for a while each of them started to take things for granted and the 'spark and mystery' of the relationship became 'elusive'.

'You do things in a monotonous fashion you don't always look forward to it.'

 You can let go of some things with an affair partner that you wouldn't with your spouse.

Affairs are how Ryan brings the 'excitement' back into his life and he enjoys the thrill of seeking them out both on business trips and at home.

'You tend to look forward to the meet ups and rendezvous. Somewhere there is a charm in breaking the shackles and doing things that are taboo,' Ryan said. 

'Call it the rebel in me or purely a human instinct.'

Ryan said that while he doesn't want to blame his cheating 'entirely on genes', he believes 'humans have had a cheating instinct for ages'.

a person sitting on a table: Affairs are how Ryan brings the 'excitement' back into his life and he enjoys the thrill of seeking them out both on business trips and at home © Provided by Associated Newspapers Limited Affairs are how Ryan brings the 'excitement' back into his life and he enjoys the thrill of seeking them out both on business trips and at home

Despite having regular affairs, Ryan does describe himself as 'happily married'... yet he has no plan to stop his 'adulterous activities'. 

'A marriage comes with more expectations and adjustments which are not necessarily at the same level in an affair,' he said. 

'I am not saying that set your bar low but just that you can let go some things with an affair partner that you wouldn't with your spouse.'

He believes this is why 'not all relationships culminate in marriage in the first place'.

Ryan started cheating just a few years into his marriage and said the best kind of affairs were those that happened 'naturally' with people he met. 

He has also tried using dating sites for married people like controversial website Ashley Madison, especially after moving to a new country.

Why do men and women cheat? 

* The most common reason for infidelity cited by women is emotional satisfaction, while men cite sexual satisfaction

* Affluent women are 8 per cent more likely to be unfaithful to their husbands than middle class wives, while the prevalence of infidelity for poor and rich men is equal

* People who are unfaithful in one relationship are three times more likely to be unfaithful in their next relationship, compared to those who have not been unfaithful in the first one

Source: Relationships Australia 

'I relocated to a new country and the earlier relations could not be pursued. In a new country with cultural differences it's harder to meet someone in a similar situation and get going,' he said.

'I can't just walk up to a woman with a ring on her finger and start chatting her up and get to an affair...  I'd have a guilty conscience and just wouldn't be able to do it. 

'I have met a few great women but none at a level that I had before.' 

While Ryan does cheat for the thrill of it, he does admit that divorce is a costly process and that does come into play when he considers his future.   

'There are costs associated with a broken marriage - emotional costs, kids and then the financial aspects of things,' he said.

Related: Believe Your Best Friend And Science: Once A Cheater, Always A Cheater [Provided by Buzz60]

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'At the end of the day, I wish to continue with my adulterous activities.'

*Name changed 

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