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She Went On An Expensive Multi-Day Destination Vacation For Her Friend's Bachelorette Party, But Now Her Friend Has Ghosted Her Regarding Cost Reimbursement, And She Does Not Want To Cover Her Friend's Share

Chip Chick logo: MainLogo Chip Chick 1/31/2023 Katharina Buczek
© Provided by Chip Chick

This young woman’s friend is getting married soon, and she was asked to be one of the bridesmaids.

So, for the bachelorette trip, her friend ultimately decided that all of the bridesmaids would go on a several-day destination vacation.

Now, her friend apparently sent out a wishlist of different events and shows that they wanted to experience on the trip. And quite generously, she and the rest of the bridesmaids booked them all for her friend.

The entire group also visited a very expensive city which required costly plane tickets and, you guessed it, expensive food and drinks.

Fortunately, their lodging accommodations were a bit more affordable because everything was split four ways.

Still, though, the trip required each bridesmaid to take a day off of work– even though not all of the women had PTO.

In spite of this, she and the bridesmaids were committed to doing everything her friend wanted to make her happy as a bride.

“And I thought we did a good job fulfilling her wishes– although it was not a trip I would ever have gone on otherwise,” she admitted.

However, the agreement prior to the trip was that everyone would split the cost of everything equally– including lodging, food, drinks, and all non-plane-related transit.

undrey – – illustrative purposes only, not the actual people © Provided by Chip Chick undrey – – illustrative purposes only, not the actual people

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The only exception to the agreement was one meal and one event, which the bridesmaids agreed to cover without any contributions from the bride.

Well, ever since the trip ended, the bride has reportedly ignored her requests for the group’s reimbursement twice.

All of the purchases were made on their credit cards, and she wanted to broach the topic with the bride as delicately as she could.

Before she could do that, though, two other bridesmaids reportedly began suggesting that they just cover more expenses than they originally anticipated.

And now, that has put her in a very uncomfortable position. The destination bachelorette trip was already “shockingly expensive” for her.

So, quite frankly, she just is not in the right financial position to cough up even more cash.

After all, she never thought she had to budget for additional expenses. On top of that, it just feels really unfair to her because it directly violates the entire agreement they made before the trip.

Finally, it makes no sense to her that she and the bridesmaids would change the entire plan just because someone– the bride– keeps ignoring them.

“As a side note, I also cannot fathom why someone is allowed to force their friends to go on such an expensive, tailored, and personalized vacation– and then make to make their friends pay for their share, too? It seems messed up, entitled, and completely unreasonable,” she vented.

At the same time, though, she is starting to feel guilty, cheap, and selfish compared to the other two bridesmaids– who are being extremely generous about the whole situation.

In fact, she admitted to feeling like a “curmudgeon” who does not want to dote on her friend before their wedding.

So, she understands why the other bridesmaids might view her as a jerk– especially because, back in the day, bridesmaids would “traditionally” pay for the bride’s share of a bachelorette party.

But honestly, this also is not the first time she and the bride have had a money disagreement in the past. In turn, she is certain that if she puts her foot down and sets a boundary regarding the trip’s expenses, then it will get back to the bride– who will have harsh feelings toward her as a result.

So, the best thing she could come up with was to be upfront with the other bridesmaids. She has since drafted an email to the group, explaining how she just is not comfortable covering even more of the bride’s expenses.

“Both due to the financial strain it would entail– hundreds of dollars– and because it is different from what we had originally planned,” she added.

She has not sent the email yet, though, because she does not want to be a “penny pincher.” Still, at the same time, she just cannot get over how unfair this entire situation feels.

So now, she has been left wondering whether not wanting to pay for the bride’s bachelorette trip expenses makes her a total jerk or not.

Why do you think the bride is ghosting her and the other bridesmaids about the expenses? Does she have a right not to want to cover the cost of a multi-day trip for someone else? Do you believe the bride’s behavior will only get worse from here? How would you handle this situation? 

You can read the original post on Reddit here.

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