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Samantha Bee Recaps Women's March, Inauguration of 'White Male Mediocrity'

TVLine logo TVLine 1/26/2017 Ryan Schwartz
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Samantha Bee wasted no time skewering President Donald Trump on Wednesday, mocking the newly minted Commander in Chief for an underwhelming inauguration and the protests that followed.

“Friday, the world watched America swear in as it’s 45th president the concept of white male mediocrity,” Bee said. “Donald Trump laid his little p—y-grabbing paw on top of two more books than he’s ever read in his life and spoke the most solemn vow he’s uttered since his third wedding.

“The whole day was swollen with lugubrious pomp and freighted with menace that left a lot of us feeling like we’d just installed ‘Trump, Emperor of Dune.'” Commenting on the low turnout for the event, Bee argued that “there was so much empty space, it’s amazing no one declared Manifest Destiny on the uncolonized end of the National Mall.”

The Full Frontal host also teased Trump for his inaugural concert, which included performances by the likes of Toby Keith, Lee Greenwood and rock band 3 Doors Down.

“Somehow, I no longer feel bad about cutting all funding for the arts,” she said. “I know our country is horribly divided, but for a moment I felt a kinship with the Trump family and their palpable, heartfelt boredom with 3 Doors Down. … Trump’s concert was like his cabinet: Male, overwhelmingly white and devoid of A-list talent.”

Later, Bee turned her attention to the women’s march that occurred the day after Trump’s inauguration, with millions of people coming out to protest the new administration all over the country.

“Our Executive Branch is in the hands of a septuagenarian size queen and a cornfed fertility cultist who calls his wife ‘mother,’ so forgive us if we’re a little worried about getting zapped back to Pleasantville,” she said. “There were marches in Kanab, Loup City and Zebulon, which sound like Star Trek planets but which I assure you are real American towns where real American people are getting real woke, real fast.”

The episode also featured a performance by Milck featuring the GW Sirens and Capital Blend, an a cappella group comprised of women who live thousands of miles apart who came together during the march to sing a new protest anthem.

Watch select clips from Full Frontal‘s post-inauguration round-up above, then drop a comment below.

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