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Pants-Off, Glance-Off: And now, for your enjoyment, we present "When Jerry Met Gwynnie," a comedy in two acts, starring Gwyneth Paltrow and Jerry Seinfeld, with a special cameo by Mrs. Jessica Seinfeld. Act 1Jerry: Gwyn, fancy meeting you at this elite Hamptons gathering. So, tell me, what is the deal with famous women going out in public without pants? Gwyneth: Oh, Jerry, Jerry, Jerry. You must be confusing me, an Oscar-winning actress, with a Lindsay or a Britney, who have been known to wear absolutely nothing, while I retain my trademark aura of classiness with these diaper-like hot pants. Jerry: Did you look behind you before you left the house? Because I'm not sure, and correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty certain I see cheek. Gwyneth: Jer, Jer, Jer, this is the Hamptons. We don't call it "cheek." It's a derriere outcropping, and it's totally chic and on-trend. Just ask your better half. Back me up, Jessica. Jessica: Look, leave me out of it. I'm just trying to keep my hand from resting in an awkward place, although I can't help but notice how fabulous your legs look, and not just because they're completely exposed and go up to my belly button. Those workouts are really paying off, Gwyn, although maybe you could have changed T-shirts before leaving the gym and coming here. Gwyneth: Oh, teeny people are so cute. Act 2Jerry (peering down): I don't care what you say, that really looks like cheek to me. Gwyneth: It's still Oscar-winning cheek, Jerry, and don't you forget it. Everybody laughs. The end.
© Gary Gershoff/Getty Images
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