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The $3,000 Nike Air Max 97 'Jesus Shoes' from MSCHF Are the Sneaker Troll of the Year

Esquire logo Esquire 10/10/2019 Brady Langmann
a man holding his hands up: The brands MSCHF and INRI customized a pair of Nike Air Max 97s with holy water, a crucifix, and more. They're called "Jesus Shoes"—and reselling for $3,000. © Courtesy The brands MSCHF and INRI customized a pair of Nike Air Max 97s with holy water, a crucifix, and more. They're called "Jesus Shoes"—and reselling for $3,000.

Shhh. It’s time for prayer. A reading from the book of Jawn: “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only pair of sneakers, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

If those shoes—divine kicks created by the big man Himself—in (the amended) John 3:16 were real, they’d be the $1,425 “Jesus Shoes” from MSCHF, which sold out minutes after their release on Tuesday morning. The Brooklyn-based product design company customized the Nike Air Max 97 with pilgrimage-appropriate specs: Holy water from the River Jordan (injected in the sneaker bubbles and blessed by a priest, naturally), Vatican-red insoles scented with Frankincense, a steel crucifix on the shoelaces, and an inscription from Matthew 14:25.

a man wearing a suit and tie: MSCHF's Collab With Jesus is the Troll of the Year © Courtesy MSCHF's Collab With Jesus is the Troll of the Year

Before you lose it and roast MSCHF, the collab is meant to be a huge troll. In a sneaker culture that legitimately tried to sell us Nicki Minaj’s Jordan Jasmines, MSCHF head of commerce Daniel Greenberg wanted to poke fun at collab culture.

“We thought of that Arizona Iced Tea and Adidas collab, where they were selling shoes that [advertised] a beverage company that sells iced tea at bodegas,” Greenberg told the New York Post. “So we wanted to make a statement about how absurd collab culture has gotten.”

Nike Air Max 97 © Courtesy Nike Air Max 97

$3000.00

Buy

If you really need to go Fleabag Hot Priest and buy a pair to complement your best vestments, you can find it on StockX. The price for the last pair sold? A cool $3,000. If that doesn't sound like your jam, you can also wait and see what MSCHF dreams up for its next drop (they happen at 11 a.m. on the second and fourth Tuesday of each month).

Until then: Can we get an Abe Lincoln x Doc Martins collab? Julius Caesar x Birkenstock? One can only pray.

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