Woman Slammed for 'Stealing' Sister's Moment After She Announced Pregnancy
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A woman on the phone talking about her pregnancy, left, and another pregnant woman angry looking at her phone, right.
The internet has been left divided after a woman announced her pregnancy just moments after her sister announced hers.
In a post on Reddit's r/AmItheA****** forum, user u/helomyo explained how she and her husband had been trying for their second baby for two and a half years.
"We lost two pregnancies during that time, though we only told our families about the first," said the woman, who was now incredibly pleased to be 13 weeks pregnant.
Planning on announcing the happy news at a family dinner with her sister, her partner and their parents, she explained they had planned to wait until the end of the meal.
"Obviously, it's exciting news, but I was worried about all the emotions that could surface for myself and my husband," she said. But their plan changed when her sister made her own announcement.
"Right after we sat down to eat, my sister announced that she and her boyfriend are expecting their first child. I was thrilled for her and congratulated her, as did the rest of the family," said the poster. "Once things had settled down, I didn't want to waste the opportunity to have everyone together and thought it would be a good opportunity to keep the joy flowing, so I shared that I'm pregnant as well."
The women's parents were very excited to be having two new grandchildren just months apart, and the sisters seemed to both be happy too. But the poster was thrown off when her sister left the dinner before dessert.
Later she received a phone call from her sister. "She called me this afternoon and told me that as happy as she was for me, she felt that I'd done a s***** thing by taking away her moment," wrote the Redditor. "She pointed out that this is my second baby and when I announced for the first time, I didn't have to share with anyone."
She explained how she didn't want to apologize to her sister, because she didn't feel she had done anything wrong. But what she said next really hurt her.
"She finished out the phone call by saying that she didn't think I was really even happy for her, if I couldn't have let her have that moment and taken another for myself later on. That really stung," wrote the poster. "I truly didn't see it that way. I saw it as sharing joy, not stealing it."
After the ordeal, she took to the internet to ask: "AITA for announcing my pregnancy immediately after my sister?"
The timing of a pregnancy announcement can be more important than you would think.
Recently a woman was backed for "stealing the spotlight" when she announced her pregnancy on the same day her cousin announced her engagement. Meanwhile, another woman was cheered for the "petty" way she announced she was expecting at her sister's wedding.
Florence Ann Romano—a personal-growth strategist and author of Build Your Village: A Guide to Finding Joy and Community in Every Stage of Life—told Newsweek: "I understand why the sister felt it would compound the joy by announcing her news. But these are very delicate moments, and the sister understandably felt upstaged.
"Even engagement announcements are held off until after the other sibling completes their nuptials. Everyone deserves their moment, and any degree of consideration is the right strategy. I would suggest privately ask for your siblings' blessing to announce synced milestones. Err on the side of caution."
Online, over 3,000 commenters shared their thoughts and were split in their opinions.
"YTA [you're the a******], for exactly what she said. You could have waited for a different day and I don't think it is bad that she wanted to be in the spotlight a little bit," said one commenter.
But others felt that the sister hadn't done anything wrong and backed her.
"This greed for attention is getting way out of hand. Your sister does not need or deserve an entire day of attention from everyone just because she managed to conceive a kid," said one commenter. "Everyone is happy for her, that should be enough. Her jealousy of you also having a pregnancy to celebrate is childish, ridiculous, and narcissistic. You're NTA [not the a******]."
Later, the poster also explained that she was visiting family from Los Angeles, with her sister living in New Jersey and parents in New York City.
Another Redditor wrote: "I don't understand this attitude at all! I would have been thrilled if one of my sisters had been pregnant at the same time as me. It would have been a blast."
Newsweek reached out to u/helomyo for comment. We could not verify the details of the case.
If you have a family dilemma, let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.
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