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Couple Planning to Invoice Wedding Guest Dropouts for Meal Costs Backed

Newsweek 9/29/2022 Leonie Helm
Wedding guests. Stock image. The average cost of a wedding in the U.S is $28,000. © Getty Images Wedding guests. Stock image. The average cost of a wedding in the U.S is $28,000.

A frustrated couple expressed annoyance after five people dropped out of their wedding, six days before the big event.

In the Mumsnet post, user MrMrsJones explains that, "Everytime someone says they aren't coming it costs us £85 plus the evening buffet cost pp.

"We didn't want two tier guests so everyone is invited to the whole day and evening. Invited a year ago and invites sent out 6 months ago. I feel like sending them an invoice. AIBU, you don't drop out 6 days before the whole thing happens." They also explain that they cut down on the "frilly bits" of the wedding "to have more friends and family."

According to wedding website The Knot, the average wedding in the U.S. is $28,000. In the U.S., New Jersey came in as the most expensive place to get married, with an average cost of $47,000, while Wyoming was the least expensive, at $15,800 on average.

Sixty-three percent of people voted that the original poster was not being unreasonable, and in a later post, the couple says, "So two have dropped out as not feeling very well. One had a new job who wouldn't let them have the time off, one is the partner of ill person and one just said they didn't fancy it.

"I asked these people as I wanted them there and they agreed to come. I have other people I could have invited instead. I have asked some friends and other family to fill the spaces. Just waiting on them to get back to us."

One user commented, "How rude of them. I would be v disappointed. Is there anyone else you would like to invite?"

In an article posted to Martha Stewart's website, wedding planner Jenna Lam suggests, "Whether you're reneging on your RSVP because you're sick, grounded due to poor weather, or have some other legitimate reason, it's important to do so tactfully."

She suggests guests should have a meaningful excuse, "Guests should keep in mind the expense and effort involved in planning a wedding when responding 'yes' to an RSVP. Couples spend lots of time and money on the event and dealing with a no-show puts a damper on the big day.

"Therefore, guests should try their best to uphold their RSVP commitment, only backing out if major outside circumstances get in the way. Weather (which can alter travel plans) and illness are acceptable reasons for not attending, since you don't want to mess with the safety and wellness of yourself or other guests."

User PaperPalace, sympathized, "It's really annoying OP, but that's life I'm afraid. We had a couple of people who just didn't turn up on the day, never let us know why or anything. This was years ago so it's not a recent trend!"

User titchy commented, "It's not costing you a penny. You'd have paid the £85 regardless. You're still paying it."

User PuttingDownRoots wrote, "New job... not their fault Ill... thats life unfortunately 'Don't fancy it'- extremely rude and don't blame you for being angry."

Newsweek was not able to verify the details of the case.

Has a wedding come between your relationship with a loved one? Let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.

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