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Weird News: Guy wants to keep the party going, despite all indications to the contrary

The Palm Beach Post logo The Palm Beach Post 6/17/2021 Eddie Ritz, Palm Beach Post
a car parked in front of a building: Stock police light display © Whigham, Julius Stock police light display

The streets of Palm Beach County and the Treasure Coast are full of wild, outrageous funny stories you won't find on the front page. Here are the most notable recent reports of peobehaving badly:

a car that is lit up at night: Stock fire siren © Whigham, Julius Stock fire siren

Jupiter

Party-hardy fool: Way past last call and well beyond closing time, two hard-partying dudes refused to leave an establishment in the 1100 block of Love Street. After being issued trespass warnings and told by police to leave, reason triumphed over drunken stupidity in one of the two men. The other, not so much. With slurred speech, he began screaming profanities at officers. Though he was eventually led off the property by his buddy, the profanity screaming went on unabated. Told to knock it off by police, the man ignored their commands and was arrested for disorderly intoxication. He was eventually dropped off at the county jail. 

Bad start, lousy finish: Pulled over in the 6700 block of West Indiantown Road after committing several traffic violations, a motorist was met by police. In addition to the infractions, police were concerned she may have been under the influence based on her slurred speech and bloodshot eyes. Though she claimed she hadn’t had anything to drink in nearly 10 hours and estimated her own intoxication level at a three out of 10, she was asked to take part in a roadside sobriety test. It did not go in her favor. In the Rhomberg alphabet portion of the test she got off to a rocky start when she forgot the letter “A.” Her finish was equally bad when she left out the letters "T" through "Z." She was arrested for DUI. Her breath later showed she was well above the legal limit. 

Unladylike behavior: Involved in a screaming match with another individual outside an establishment in the 200 block of North US 1, a woman began challenging the responding police officer. Charging at the officer, she began yelling at him while pressing her body directly against him. The extremely intoxicated woman was advised to step back. Though she may have normally been a wonderful person who volunteers at an animal shelter and sings in the church choir, on this night, the alcohol-fueled, enraged woman had to be physically restrained by her boyfriend. Ripping away from her man and again bumping into the officer, she was arrested for disorderly intoxication. 

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Lantana

Sleep stealer: Slowly being swept away by the sandman, an individual had his journey to dreamland violently interrupted when someone smashed the window of his residence in the 800 block of Minnesota Street with a rock. The victim told police he believed his neighbor, with whom he’d had previous issues, was the sleep-disrupting culprit. Despite his suspicions, he requested police not contact the neighbor and advised he would speak with the landlord to discuss the matter. 

Career-killing moves: After asking for multiple weeks off from his job in the 400 block of East Ocean Avenue, and being granted them, a man asked to leave early one day. He was given permission and then didn’t return the following day ... or for three days after that. Though he hadn’t called in or asked for additional time off, the man was shocked and angered when he was notified that he was being terminated. Launching into a profanity-laden tirade, he called his boss “Mother (expletive)” and added to that zinger stating he was a “Lying mother (expletive).” Then, to add a bit of suspense and danger to the encounter, the man, who had been given multiple weeks off for the asking and then not returned to work, told his supervisor "he will see what’s going to happen." Police attempted to contact the man with negative results. 

Rock beats glass: Hearing one of the windows at his residence in the 1300 block of Cardinal Lane being smashed, a man rushed outside to find the perpetrator. Though he did not see the individual, he did see their vehicle as it raced off. Reviewing security footage from a neighbor’s camera, police were able to get the make and model of the vehicle. The perp’s face was not visible. The victim’s stepson then advised that his boyfriend’s ex-boyfriend drives the same vehicle and may be responsible. Despite the lead, the stepson could only provide the suspect’s first name and had no contact information at that time. 

North Palm Beach

Tag, you're caught: Pulled over on Prosperity Farms Road for driving a suspected stolen vehicle, the driver was removed from the car. Though the vehicle turned out not to be stolen, the license plate that was attached to it was from a car that was reported stolen out of Miami. The driver said he got the tag from a friend but did not know it had been taken off a stolen vehicle. In addition to driving a car with an illegal tag, the driver himself was driving without a legal license. The man’s license had several active suspensions dating back to 2007. To round out the evening and go three for three, illegal prescription narcotics were found hidden inside a pack of cigarettes inside the car. The man was arrested on the three charges. 

'No problem'? Problem: After showing signs that he may have been drinking or even doing shots all night, a motorist was pulled over on US 1. Smelling of an unknown alcoholic beverage, he was asked whether he’d been drinking that evening. He replied that he’d had “a couple of beers, no problem.” Agreeing to take part in a roadside sobriety test, the man had some trouble. Swaying through one portion, unable to touch his own nose in another, he really shined when he made four mistakes attempting to recite the alphabet. He was arrested for DUI.  He later refused to provide a sample of his breath. 

Palm Beach Gardens 

No baby on board: Pushing a baby stroller inside a store in the 3100 block of PGA Boulevard, a woman was definitely no June Cleaver. In fact, if she even was a mother, she likely left her baby at home with some scissors to play with and was only using the stroller as a receptacle for all the merchandise she was attempting to steal. One of the store’s loss prevention associates spotted the antics of the "mother of the year" and attempted to apprehend her has she walked out of the store. She quickly abandoned the stroller and fled the store. The approximately $1,200 worth of merchandise was recovered. The stroller was thrown away. 

Played through: Pulling up to a party in her golf cart at a residence in the 100 block of Isle Drive, a woman got out and went inside to get down. After approximately three hours of tripping the lights fantastic, she left the party and headed home. Realizing the next day that the clubs that had been in her golf cart were missing, she contacted the party’s host to see if he had an idea what happened to them. He did not — and neither did any of the other guests. Though all hope seemed lost and the nearly $4,000 worth of golf gear gone for good, the woman got a strange surprise when she arrived at her residence several days later and found the missing clubs and gear in her garage. The garage door opener was also in the bag and the woman believes that’s how they were able to return them without her knowing. All was right (for the moment) in one corner of this increasingly crazy world.  

Nightmarish joy ride: Giving new meaning to the phrase drinking and driving, a man did just that as he was consuming beverages whilst piloting a motorized shopping cart around a store in the 4200 block of Northlake Boulevard. Though not exactly fast, and possibly not even that furious, the man was causing a disturbance inside the business. After he was pulled over by police, a records check showed the man had an active trespass warning for the store. Informed of this fact, the man claimed it wasn’t him and that it was someone else impersonating him. Knowing the man from multiple past encounters, police arrested him for trespass after warning and released him with a notice to appear.  

'Nacho' man: Exceeding the speed limit while traveling on North Military Trail, a motorist was pulled over near Hood Road. Making contact with the driver inside his car, the officer immediately detected the smell of alcoholic beverages. With a mood that ranged from respectful and cooperative to defensive, the man wavered on whether he had consumed any alcohol that evening. At first, he said no and then later changed his answer to one glass of wine with dinner. Stating to the police, “What would you have me do?” several times, the man again said he’d had one glass of wine with “nachos, not nachos, they give chips with queso, not queso, salsa.” He then agreed to take part in a roadside sobriety test. His performance earned him an arrest for DUI. His breath later showed he was over the legal limit.

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West Palm Beach 

Just roll with it: In an area in the 2300 block of Spruce Avenue known for flagrant, open-air drug sales and multiple shootings, a man could be seen rolling a marijuana cigarette or “joint.” As police began approaching the joint-rolling aficionado, he became alert to their presence and slowly began backing away. Though he was advised by police to stop moving, it must have been the opposite day because the man immediately took off like an Olympian going for gold. While running, officers saw him throw something down and were able to retrieve it. The man was caught and detained a short distance away. The "something" was a plastic bag filled with four smaller plastic bags that were each filled with a green leafy substance. That substance turned out to be marijuana. He was arrested for drug possession and resist/obstruction without violence. 

Knives out, masks off: While work was being done at a residence in the 5500 block of Hobart Avenue, a man’s chainsaw was stolen by two knife-wielding individuals. The man who witnessed the crime was not the owner of the tool but said he had originally attempted to stop the two miscreants. He changed his mind when they pulled the knives out. The men then got back into their truck with the stolen chainsaw and raced off. The master criminals, and possible COVID spreaders, were not wearing masks — and the tool's owner, who was also present during the theft, said he could easily identify them. In addition, the home security system captured them racing away. 

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Stuart 

Un-handy man: Trying get inside a residence Southeast Osceola Street, a man began pulling on the door handle while yelling. So intent was he on gaining entry that he nearly pulled the door off before giving up and fleeing. Found lying down in the front yard of a nearby home, the man said he was not from the area and didn’t even know what street he was on. He claimed he was supposed to do some handyman-type work on a house, but didn’t know which one. He said his struggle to get into the residence was only from his desire to get started on the job. He was identified by the home’s resident, who stated she had not scheduled any type of work. The man was arrested. He later stated he was staying at a nearby hotel after recently being released from a halfway house. He was taken to jail. 

Martin County Sheriff’s Office 

Intoxication station: Yelling, screaming and banging on the windows of vehicles behind an establishment in the 1900 block of Northeast Jensen Beach Boulevard, a man was met by sheriff’s deputies. Having either consumed copious amounts of alcohol or not that much and just a lightweight, the man was so inebriated that he was unable to speak in complete sentences. In addition to drinking himself into a state of near incommunicado, his alcohol consumption increased his stubbornness and he refused to give deputies his identification. He was arrested and taken to jail. 

Compiled by Eddie Ritz from area law enforcement records.

This article originally appeared on Palm Beach Post: Weird News: Guy wants to keep the party going, despite all indications to the contrary

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